One of my favorite life discoveries was in finding that as humans, we all share the same basic struggle. We have our highs and our successes, but no matter how far we soar, the pendulum inevitably swings us back for at least a brief visit, to our lows and our failures.
I once thought my lows and failures were a sign of the truth of who I was…that maybe my highs and successes were just luck and that deep down, I was really just a confused and lost soul.
Fortunately, I discovered I wasn’t a confused and lost soul, but rather, I was merely human. Whew – what a total relief!
The lows and failures are not a confirmation of our weakness, but rather, a GIFT given to help us be more and choose better.
If we can be gentle with ourselves and treat this as a normal part of life, we can finally relax and resist the tendency to live in a perpetual state of self-judgment, fear and anxiety. Instead, we can become more quiet when we are experiencing a low or failure. We can slow down and pay attention…what is there to learn, what might we change, what do we need more or less of, how might we improve so this low can be made worth the pain?
Rather than trying to get it all right and perfect, I love what the quote I included suggests. “Instead of thinking about solving your whole life, you just think about adding additional good things. One at a time. Just let your pile of good things grow.”
When looking at your life, it is best to keep it simple. Rather than trying to solve your entire life, simply start to notice what feels good and what feels bad. Make it your job to be the expert on YOU and don’t judge what you discover. Trust your feelings, your instincts, your intuition. Spend more time with people who uplift you, and less around those who don’t. Increase the habits and activities that enhance you and decrease the ones that don’t. As the quote so perfectly says, “One at a time. Just let your pile of good things grow.”
Fixing your life is not about sheer force and struggle. Like all good things, it requires simplicity, truth and love. Keep it simple. Be truthful about what is good for you and what is bad for you. Lastly and most importantly, do all these things in love. Be gentle with yourself, honor yourself and let the good things grow.